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56 Up - 2012 - 9/10

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Latest installment of the outstanding Up documentary series, which began in 1963 with 7 Up.
The children are now 56.  As theorized, the personality of the child very much predicted the adult.  The other notions, such as class separation, did not hold as much.  Privilege helped, though not always. Likewise, many of the East Enders climbed far.
At their current age, none of them allowed themselves to be baited, goaded or bullied by director Apted.
Worth tracking down right now as the three part series.  The DVD releases are never as good as the TV airings.
Charles, ever the twit, remains MIA.

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Kidnapped - 2010 - 2/10

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Reprehensible cinema from Spain.
Three hooded thugs invade the home of a Madrid family.
Expect beatings, rapes, torture, killings, gore.
I would have scored this far, far lower, save for the lively hutong discussion that followed.
Everyone recognized mistake after mistake made by the victims.
An invasion is not a burglary or stickup.  Invasion is a death fight - always.
Audience members kept barking to the invaded, especially the father,  "Do this!  Do this!"
Most unpleasant film.  Consider yourself warned.

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Lost World:  Jurassic Park - 1997 - 5/10

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Considered the weakest of the original trilogy, yet my personal favorite.
Main reason - the sheer quantity of meals.
With two tyrannosaurs and a pack of velociraptors, I expect to see tasty kills.
This does not disappoint.
From the opening child (gutlessly explained away) to all those armed and experienced hunters to Fido.
Chomp chomp chomp!
Unfortunately, director Spielberg, at this stage of his career, was still pandering to his core soccer mommy audience.
So, violence and mayhem tinged, this is more or less family friendly.
Another big problem is the script.
Most of the characters, so-called seasoned professionals, are astonishingly dumb.
For all its flaws, this is a guilty pleasure.  I just wish someone could edit out the human stupidity.

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The Empire Begins - 2015 - 6/10

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Fan-editor Darth Awesome combines all three Star Wars prequels into a single viewing experience, running two hours forty minutes.  The heaviest trims come from Phantom Menace.  The main sequence is the duel between Darth Maul vs Obi Wan and Qui-Gon Jinn.  For action fans seeking Clone Wars, this is not it.  Though Darth Awesome describes it as rise of Empire, fall of Anakin, the story is really a character study of Anakin Skywalker, with all the good and bad that entails.

Not scratching here, but pointing things out.  Planet Kamino barely appears, to me a startling omission.  As noted, all but eight minutes of Phantom Menace was jettisoned.  The battle on Geonosis was minimized.  Duly noticed and missed.  General Grievous, on the other hand, was no loss.  I could go on and on, parts I missed, others I was happy to see gone.  The narrative holds together, but this is a story about Anakin, and I don’t particularly care for this Jedi.  Exchanges with Padme remain awful, specifically because of utter lack of chemistry between the leads.

Grumbles aside, I did enjoy Mr Awesome’s edit.  I rewatch E02 and E03 fairly frequently, E01 never.  There is clever invention in this effort.  Definitely recommended, especially to readers who have a fondness for the Christensen films.  For those who hated them, I doubt this will better your opinion.

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Cleanskin - 2012 - 6/10

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Sean Bean portrays hardened government op. Charlotte Rampling his boss.
Assigned to track down some home grown terrorists (cleanskins) who are doing suicide bombings in London.
Other narrative tracks the recruitment and enlistment of an angry young man into a terror cell.
Violent fare with a few twists, stalemates.
Well made film that will make you uncomfortable afterwards.

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Bright Leaves - 2003 - 7/10

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Gaze longingly, nicotine fiends.  Green fields of burley.
Ross McElwee documentary about the decline of great grandfather's empire, and tobacco itself.
The sire brought out the Durham Bull blend, crushed when Duke released pre-rolled Bull Durham cigarettes.
Duke today is a charitable foundation, a university, global empire, and probably the cause of millions of cancer deaths.
McElwee is forgotten, though survives in an old Gary Cooper film, Bright Leaf (that was blend that grew in North Carolina).
This follows the typical meandering pace of all Ross McElwee docs, delivered in his soft Southern cadence, and his usual wit.
Well worth seeing, though if you want the most accessible McElwee flick, hunt down Sherman's March.

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Kumiko, The Treasure Hunter - 2013 - 7/10

. . . Based on a true story.
So begins this unlikely quest as main character Kumiko obsessively views a worn VHS.
The film is a far-fetched documentary where, at the end, a suitcase stuffed with money is buried under snow near a fence.  The criminal marks the spot with a red ice scraper.  Then it is forgotten.
The documentary is the movie Fargo, and Kumiko is convinced the money waits still.  For her.
At age 29, Kumiko is an over-the-hill office girl.
Her boss wants her gone.  Her mother wants her to marry, get pregnant, or move in with her.
Instead, she flies to Minneapolis in the dead of winter and begins trudging north.

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The Japanese section moves very slow.  Kumiko is a social misfit and almost shunned.
Once in the States, she is also an outsider but is tolerated as a foreigner or turista.
Nevertheless, she is an isolated, driven soul.
And winters in the Dakotas are unforgivable.

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A haunting film with unforgettable, stark landscape.
Kumiko’s story, by the way, was “inspired” by the urban legend of Takako Konishi.

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Verdun - Visions d'Histoire - 1928 - 7/10

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Long (150 minutes) dramatization / reenactment of the historic battle for Verdun during World War I.
This is helped along with some stock footage, as well as maps, diagrams, and rough animation.
WWI had ended only a decade earlier, so original audiences would have been quite familiar with the history.
Tactics are shown for both German and French.  Victories are noted, as are defeats.
British troops are referenced, but they were busy at the Somme.
Yanks would not enter the war until 1917, a full year after Verdun.
For history buffs - especially war buffs - this is interesting throughout.
This is a nice companion to the BBC series, The Great War (1963).

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Iron Sky - Director's Cut - 2012 - 6/10

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Nazis! This time on the Moon!
A battalion of the Third Reich fled WWII aftermath and hid out on the dark side of the Moon.
Sixty years later, their base is discovered and they launch blitzkrieg.
Funny satire with great looking old school contraptions.
Political / military humor was dead on, Sarah Palin lookalike as gun totin’ US President! What’s not to like?
Other elements felt forced. Example: the racial purity storyline.
Still quite funny with unexpectedly nice SciFi action sequences.
The Director’s Cut added additional special effects after early profits rolled in.
The sequel is coming!

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La Fiancée du Pirate - 1969 - 6/10
AKA - A Very Curious Girl

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Revenge film about the maltreated village slag.
After Marie’s mother is killed by a hit n run, and her pet goat comes to a bad end, she methodically gets even.
No more kissing and cuddling with menfolk to warm the nights.  Now it’s,  “Money first.”
Village men pay.  And pay.  Marie may not be easy on the eyes, but she is easy - - when cash is offered.
When irate wives refuse to give husbands money, the men barter watches or possessions.
When elders try to persuade her to cease, she offers a little persuasion of her own.
Even though this is likely set in the late 1960s (a poster with Belle de Jour is in one scene), one gets a feeling this could have been set in Medieval France.
Look quick for Louis Malle as the penniless Spaniard, “no tengo dinero,” who scores, nevertheless!

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Secret Agent X-9 - 1945 - 7/10

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Thirteen part Universal serial with Lloyd Bridges, Jan Wiley and Keye Luke.
Action takes place on Shadow Island, only independent "nation" in the China Sea.
Nest of spies, agents, saboteurs, criminals, gamblers.
Japanese - Nazis - Aussies - Chinese - Yanks know who is who and clash accordingly.
Plot revolves around the Japanese pursuit of 722.  The Allies have no idea what that is, but they are determined to discover and thwart.
Fairly realistic, as far as serials go. No jokes, no comic elements. Cold blooded killings occur.
Much of the story occurs at night, so most scenes are dark. Few cheats.

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A Lonely Place To Die - 2011 - 6/10

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Pursuit thriller set in the Scottish highlands.
Group of vacationing mountain climbers discovered a kidnapped child.
They free then tried to keep ahead of the kidnappers.
Nothing out of the ordinary here.
The "victim" was an annoying, shrill screamer, and the climbers kept yelling,  "Where are you?  Where are you?" every time they eluded their ****s.
Plot twists were fairly unexpected, and location shots were great.

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Juha - 1999 - 6/10

Black n white, Silent movie from Finland.  And yes, this predates The Artist by a good decade.
Married Juha and Marja live quietly and simply on the farm.  Social activities include friends, or the club.
Into their life, however, comes a sleek, if ailing, Corvette.  Driven by the city soul, Shemeikka.
While Juha repairs the visitor’s sports car, the driver immediately woos Marja.
She’s too nice for this life, she deserves better.
The contest between flash and stable usually has one outcome.
And into the darkness of the city the wayward wife plunges.

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Bleak tale, though surprisingly funny at times.
Broad acting at points, subtle nuance during other moments.
A very modern soundtrack - added immensely and jarred inappropriately.
Well cast with average looking faces.

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5 Flights Up - 2014 - 7/10

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Arthouse / indie film set in Brooklyn of two seniors considering selling their flat.
There is a hefty financial inducement to sell (estimate - $1 mil), but mostly those five flights, no elevator.
Diane Keaton plays an ex-schoolteacher, Morgan Freeman an artist whose work is currently passe.
Leisurely paced slice of life, low on action, though huge events are happening.
For the couple, this could be the last move / last major decision they get to make.
They brace for the blitz of prospective buyers, as well as idlers who look because they are bored.
Ratings on this seemed segregated by age demographics.
Younger viewers bored - older viewers spellbound.
Those who have all the time in the world, those whose days are numbered.
Numerous flashbacks of the couple, forty years younger, when they dated then married in the 70s.
Possibly better appreciated by those 45 and older.

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Two Days, One Night - 2015 - 6/10
AKA - Deux jours, une nuit

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Many unanswered questions litter this Belgium/French film.
Just as Sandra is ready to return to her workplace, she learns she has been laid off.
Workmates were given a vote:  Keep Sandra, or let her go and get a bonus of €1000 each.
Late Friday, the employer agrees to a second vote on Monday morning.
There were only 16 employees involved, and the narrative follows Sandra as she goes from house to house, person to person, begging to reinstate her job and give up that bonus.
A moral dilemma, to be sure, and sadly, not uncommon.

To be blunt, I did not like Sandra.  She was out with depression (film did not say how long), she pops Xanacs like candy, suffers repeated meltdowns, and constantly gives up.
All of us have worked with characters like Sandra.  Quitters, whiners, weak souls everyone else must carry.
Females who watched with me, were grudgingly more sympathetic.
They said I have no conception of what it is like to deal with moodswings and raging hormones.  
Too bad, find another line of work.

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A Hard Days Night - 1964 - 9/10

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Classic film capturing the Beatles during their meteoric, giddying ascent.
Funny, witty, irreverent, featuring great songs, gear clothes, posh clubs ...
The lads would continue to grow in fame and importance, but there is something especially exciting about this period, when they were streaking to heights unknown.
So many of my young friends and colleagues assumed the Fab Four were Sgt Pepper or The White Album.
No so. The early period was essential, and terrific fun.
The final 12 minutes or so, the concert, Richard Lester somehow, brilliantly, captured lightning in a bottle.
Sheer exuberance, and a tonic.

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The Cabin In The Woods - 2012 - 7/10

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I watched this grudgingly.  Definitely not the Joss Whedon fan.
The dialogue he writes for actors strikes me as twee and arch.
Film opened with 5 college kids driving for a weekend in the woods.
Christ, another dead teenager flick.
I hung with the movie, however, because there were mysterious lab technicians in a parallel narrative.
Curious.
Deep into the plot, threads converge into a neat twist and a hair raising finale.
Horror fans, there is mayhem throughout.

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Iris - 2014 - 5/10

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Final movie of legendary documentary filmmaker Albert Maysles proves a shallow disappointment.
The cameras trail after unlikely fashion icon, Iris Apfel, without getting at the essence of her, or how she achieved her position.
She and her husband have a home on Park Avenue, another in Palm Beach.
These are plainly ultra-rich.  How did they accumulate such wealth?
(Note: Wiki indicates they ran a textile firm for 40 years.  Such crass commerce barely touched on in film.)
Her so-called taste, which favored clunky and garish beads was praised by all with not a single dissent.

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When the husband casually mentioned how difficult Jackie Kennedy was, Iris quickly closed the topic saying they were not allowed to discuss any of their work dealing with the White House.
(Note: Wiki indicates the couple did White House restorations for Truman, Eisenhower, Kennedy, Johnson, Nixon, Ford, Carter, Reagan, and Clinton.)
Nonetheless, Maysles let that slide without comment.  He allowed much to pass by unquestioned.
A feel-good, hail jolly good fellow, surface skipping 80 minute soufflé.
I ended up with a cynical suspicion that so many designer and curators praised and gushed over her because she was in her 90s and they lusted after her collection.

Those of you who have a wacky grandma or auntie - - there but for fortune . . .

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Jiro Dreams Of Sushi - 2011 - 7/10

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Documentary about tiny, hole in the wall, sushi bar in a Tokyo subway, run by 85 year old Jiro.
The place seats 9, the reservation list is for one month, prices start at ¥30000 yen ($350 - £241 - €304).
No drinks, no appetizers.  Just sushi.
Apprenticeship lasts a decade.  Michelin gave the place three stars.
- Squeamish Alert -
Part of the hutong who viewed this - those who selected it - went hysterical when some of the servings were far, far fresher than they had anticipated.
There was screaming in the room and hands over eyes.  
You have been warned.

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Natural Born Killers: Tarantino Cut - 1994 / 2015 - 6/10

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Fanedit of Stone’s over the top meat grinder.  Cut to 56 minutes!

Editor “thecuddlyninja” follows Tarantino’s original script and removes Stone’s Indian shaman, snake, parents, drugs, media sermonizing, focusing on mayhem.  Best of all, because Stone never bothered with them, there are no monotonous Tarantino conversations.  So this version kicks!

With so much footage sheared, coherency suffers.  Example: when Mickey is in Drug Zone we figure out he needs anti-snake medicine.  How and when he was bitten was not shown, however.  Another mystery:  The Botango riot starts outta nowhere.  That should have been handled better.

Another problem is the song selection.  All original music is wiped, replaced with cuts from Tarantino films.  It is distracting, especially when you try to figure out if it came from Reservoir Dogs, Pulp Fiction, Kill Bill, wh****ot.

Otherwise, this is a nice down n dirty, storyboard rough version of an often overlong film.

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