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After.Life - 2009 - 6/10

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Christina Ricci breaks up with her boyfriend (as he's trying to propose, no less!). Storms off in the driving rain.The road is treacherous but the cellphone beckons.  (Again!!!)
Next sequence, she's on the slab arguing with Liam Neeson.
"I'm not dead. I can't be."
"That's what you all say."
Neeson is a mortician with a gift. He can communicate with the dead in the three day window as they transition from this world to the next.
Dour, unsettling film. Especially when you begin to wonder if Ricci's character is not really dead.
Definitely not an action flick, and the characters are not sympathetic ones.

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The Wicked Lady - 1945 - 6/10

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Dated, though still entertaining tale of treachery amongst the gentry.
Guiless Caroline invites best friend / cousin Barbara to be her maid of honour.
Before you can warn, Barb not only swipes the groom but marries him.
Baby-making?  Ha ha.  Separate bedrooms, hers with a secret passage.
Soon she beds gallant swains and loads her pistols.
Oh, for a life of crime.
Margaret Lockwood became a star with the despicable Barbara.
Ideal for the dreary afternoon.

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The Town That Loves Books - Arts At Hay - 2014 - 6/10

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Documentary on the biggest book fair in Britain, in small Hay-on-Wye.
Dealers, publishers, authors, celebrities, fan-fiction, fans, rain rain rain.
Doc is hopeful one frame, worrisome the next.
On one hand it is reassuring to see people buying and taking an interest in books.
On the other, publishing houses are dwindling, and it is harder for new writers, save celebrity authors.
Thanks to self publishing, anyone can be an author!  Though no one may buy your book.
I watched this with library types - they were in a happy place.

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Lila Lila - 2009 - 6/10

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Aimless waiter discovers manuscript in stuck end table drawer.
To impress a girl, he shows and declares he wrote it.
In swift succession - publication, literary sensation, public adulation!
Hey, wait a minute, I saw this story.
They swiped this from 2012‘s The Words.
No, that can’t be right.  I mean, 2009 came before ...
Device of wayward creation claimed  by another is fairly common.
This version is lighter, supposedly a comedy.
German humor is lost on me.

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Bad Lieutenant - Port Of New Orleans - 2009 - 6/10

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Where to begin ...
Nicholas Cage gives a crazed, over the top performance in this Werner Herzog film.
A cop with no morals or check switch.
The group I watched this with hated it.
As for me, well, I have mixed feelings.
With Val Kilmer, Brad Dourif, Eva Mendes, and Xzibit, this should have been better than a television knockoff.
Cage's character pops more drugs than Mötley Crüe, with less consequences.
For local color, Herzog did some point of view shots from the back of an alligator, later an iguana.
Plastic alligators!
If you view this as a parody of police procedurals, you may like this better.

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Dorian Gray - 2009 - 7/10

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Stylish retelling of the Oscar Wilde classic.
Young man who never ages no matter how many sins he commits.
Dark, sexy, perfumed with decadence.
Stunning set design, a high point being Dorian’s house which has a palpable presence.
Insightful audio commentary, as well.
Stars Ben Barnes, Colin Firth, Ben Chaplin, Fiona Shaw, and the Witanhurst House in Highgate.
Yes, the house is very much a character.
More Masterpiece Theatre rather than Horror, still an unexpected find.

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Mantis In Lace - 1968 - 3/10
AKA - Lila

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So ... while watching German “comedy” Lila Lila, my brain started hearing the old song, “Lila.”
Bad tune, from a bad movie, that I have viewed several times.  Feeble mind.
Topless dancer Lila shimmies at da club, gyrating to her signature “Lila” song.
Guys pick her up and she hauls them to her nest.
Abandoned warehouse, stained mattress, candles in Mateus bottles.
Lila drops LSD, drops her dress, and before she can cry,  “Oh my God!”
Her acid trip goes haywire and she starts killin’.  Repeat - repeat - repeat.

No one watches this for acclaimed acting or nuanced script.
Nope, the allure is vast stretches of nudity punctuated with gruesome deaths.
Warning to current era viewers.  All females are from the bush era.
If your preference is Barbie’s waxed sheen, you will likely hurl your nachos.

Afterthought - The DVD has lots of extras, including a couple “dangers of drugs” docs,
and over 100 minutes of deleted scenes and outtakes.  More dancers, tons more flesh.
One dancer I recognized from Russ Meyer’s Mondo Topless.  Err, her assets ... I mean.

 

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House Of Bamboo - 1957 - 6/10

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Sam Fuller movie, often pigeon holed as Asian Noir is more suitably Tourist Noir.
Ex-soldier (Robert Stack) arrives Tokyo after buddy summons him for crooked money.
Buddy is dead and Stack begins selling “protection.”  Rich visuals in this section.
Eventually he gets recruited into a small gang of Army ex-pats led by Robert Ryan.
Lost man in unfamiliar city is Noir enough.
Numerous logic errors, though.
Wouldn’t authorities notice a crew of tall, white faced gaijin committing robberies?
Writers mention a homoerotic angle - maybe, maybe not.
I think they are trying to make a ho-hum plot seem interesting.

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MR James: Ghost Writer - 2013 - 6/10

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Presenter Mark Gatiss narrates the life and works of premier ghost story scribe, M R James.
Excerpts from stories, talking heads, location shots of Cambridge and Eton.
A scholar, and solitary man.  Typical of most writers, James himself is not particularly compelling.
Forays into his sexual inclinations are idle speculation.
Time filler.

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The Disappearance Of Alice Creed - 2009 - 6/10

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I picked this up, blithely assuming it would be a fun ride thriller.
Plus, Gemma Arterton is easy on the eyes.
An unrelenting, grim, kidnapping yarn.
Methodical preparation, the quick snatch, then plans slowly sour, as back histories and private agendas surface.
Music was gloomy, too.
Didn't care for this, but well executed.

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Night Of The Demon - 1957 - 6/10

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Old school ghost tale based on M R James’ classic,  “Casting The Runes.”
American professor come to London for conference on supernatural.
He runs afoul of devil worshiper and realizes a curse has been placed.
Moody, atmospheric film, with adversaries polite and well mannered.
Dana Andrews fine as skeptical American joining forced with colleague’s younger niece.
Fortunately, there is no icky romance which would be de rigueur nowadays.

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Dawn French:  30 Million Minutes - 2014 - 5/10

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Give the comedian an A for effort in her one-woman show.
Ms French charges about the stage, reacts to huge "BOYS!!" signs, while giving a personal history tour.
Growing up, her family, and her body image - the latter, at length.
Laughs are rare in the first hour.
At times, she seems to pause a second or two, waiting for applause or laughter that never comes.
Females I watched this with giggled during the “mother daughter” section, the last 20 minutes.
More memoir than stand up comedy, though not always memorable.
This ain‘t Vicar Of Dibley, it ain’t French & Saunders, and it sure as hell ain’t Ab Fab.
Live show was wildly popular, nevertheless.

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St. Trinian's - 2007 - 6/10

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Remake of the 50s classic series.
England's notorious St. Trinian's all girl school.
Lots of girls in uniforms. Cute girls, hot babes, randy vixens, Goth gurlz, stoners.
Goofy hijinks in a silly plot to save the school for misfits from closure.
This comedy was slagged by a pile UK critics, 35-60 year old geezers, but has fared better after a recent global release. A hoot from beginning to end.
Colin Firth, Rupert Everett, Gemma Arterton, Russell Brand, and probably 10 future stars.

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The Blade - 1995 - 7/10
AKA:  Dāo / 刀

Spectacular Hong Kong swordsplay action.
Stuntwork is dazzling in this, and I would not be surprised it dismemberment had occurred.
Rivalry within a swordsmith’s fortress creates tension and discontent.
Outside the walls - somewhere - marauding bandits pillage at will.
The landscape is splattered with various battles and bloodbaths, while bandit numbers swell.
What they really need, however, are more swords.

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Exceptional Tsui Hark film, though less known, perhaps, because it is relentlessly grim, dark, bleak.
No heroes here.  Survivors, betrayers, murderers.
Violent retelling of the one-armed swprdsman tale.
Hong Kong released quite a number of pessimistic films fore-shadowing the takeover.
Hard Boiled, Burning Paradise, Black Sun, are a few that come to mind.
The Blade will be an action lover’s dream.

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The High And The Mighty - 1954 - 7/10

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In the mood for old-fashioned airline disaster film?
Look no further.  This is the root of mainstream copies and inevitable spoofs.
Large cast headed by John Wayne and Robert Stack (coupled with “names” of the era and well as recognizable character actors) climb aboard the Honolulu to San Francisco four prop plane.
The flight seems only half full and seats are spacious.
Passengers each given their moment to tell their story.
Before the engine trouble arrives, then fuel problems.
Wayne very good in understated role as weary albatross observing Stack’s character navigate inner demons.
At times corny and predictable, most of the film is a tense thriller.  Grand entertainment.

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Women, Sex and Society - Timewatch Guide - 2016 - 5/10

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Hour “documentary” about women’s fight for rights over 100 years.
Three eras:  Suffragette movement of 1890s, the Swinging 60s, and the 90s.
Talking heads skim the surface.  Suffragette radicals, fight for abortion, employment.
Numerous popular movies would serve the curious better.
Suffragette from 2015, or 2010‘s Made In Dagenham.
This whole production felt like a homework assignment.  Badly padded, at that.

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A Town Called Panic - 2009 - 7/10

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Man, I rolled my eyes when someone chose this kiddie film.
Slap me wrong, this was entertaining fun.
Monty Python-esque animations, subtitled Belgium cursing, adventures ranging from under the sea, to the center of the earth, and music class romance.

How Horse puts up with Indian and Cowboy is beyond me.

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Under The Shadow - 2016 - 6/10

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Offbeat, and off the beaten track ghost story from Iran.
Near 1988, the end of the Iran - Iraq War, a bombed out roof allows a djinn to enter an apartment.
Or is does it ride in with the haunted orphan boy from Abadan?
Unclear, in a good way.  Items go missing and an unease descends.
Soon enough, inhabitants divide between believers and scoffers.
As bombings intensify, those who believe in spirits do the proper thing - they run.
Leaving behind, a mother and daughter.
Usually I would never watch any US film with the “kid in peril” device as they are 98% predictable.
This, being an Iranian production, will upset predictions.
Good spook story.

Note - I downed several subs and was happy with none.  Typos, odd timestamps, no caps for names.
I tweaked a set and uploaded if you need - http://www.addic7ed.com/movie/119833

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